How a Ringtone Nearly Derailed My Day
Posted: 22 July, 2025
By: Marieta du Toit
Spoiler alert: It was sensory overload — and surprisingly easy to fix.
Ever have one of those days where your thoughts feel like they’ve scattered to the four corners of your brain — and you’re not quite sure why? Same. I was starting to wonder if I needed a brain scan… things just weren’t clicking.
My husband and I both work from home, and we love it. Give us a laptop, a phone, decent Wi-Fi, and we’re good to go. One of the perks? Being able to move around the house chasing the best sunlight (and maybe a bit of peace and quiet).
But here’s where things went sideways: his phone. FULL VOLUME. Mine? Silent. Always.
And every time it rang, it felt like a personal attack on my nervous system.
You know that chalkboard-scratching, nerve-grating kind of sound that gets under your skin? Yep, that was it. By the third ring, I wasn’t just annoyed, I was spiralling. Productivity: gone. Mood: tanked. I was inching through work at the pace of a sleepy sloth.
Now, I hate conflict. So I did what I shouldn’t do — stewed in silence, until I nearly exploded. But thankfully, I caught myself just in time and realised: it wasn’t him. It was the sound.
The Aha Moment:
This wasn’t about my husband being annoying. It was about me being triggered by a sound I couldn’t ignore. Classic sensory overload.
How I Turned It Around:
✔️ I named the real problem: the phone’s volume, not the person holding it.
✔️ I used my words. Calmly. “Honey, would you mind turning your ringtone down a bit? It’s really throwing off my focus.”
✔️ He said, “Of course!” Problem solved. No drama, no blame, just… relief.
Turns out, the “auditory attack” wasn’t a personal vendetta. It was just my brain saying, “Too much!” And once I recognised it for what it was, I could fix it, kindly and quickly.
The Takeaway:
Knowing your sensory triggers and taking action = fewer irritations and distractions, and way more good days.
PS: Hubby says the new, gentler ringtone is way better for him too. Win-win.