Work-Life Balance

One of my favourite YouTube videos must be Mark Gungor’s description of the difference between men’s and women’s brains. In his very entertaining demeanour, he explains how men tend to store their thoughts and experiences in various boxes. These boxes are separated from each other, never touching, ensuring that each subject remains a stand-alone entity. When, for example, they are in their work box, they’re ONLY occupied and focussed on work: that’s all they can think about at that specific time. Don’t even bother jumping to another subject such as family, religion or even fishing… he’s in his work box!

According to Pastor Gungor (yes, you read that right!), women on the other hand, have no boxes… EVERY thought and idea has a link to EVERYTHING else happening in her brain! When a woman is out jogging, she is already planning that evening’s supper… which leads to thoughts about her family whom she’s been meaning to invite for a visit… which leads to empathetic thoughts about her ill cousin… which leads to her making a mental note to send flowers to this cousin… which leads to worrying thoughts about the drought and the fact that her garden at home is withering away… and so it carries on… and on… and on… a never-ending train of thought…!

This hypothesized comical phenomenon is of course a generalized idea. On the odd occasion, you might find the opposite: lucky are those women who can put their thoughts and ideas into boxes too. And some men might also be burdened… blessed?… by connecting all their thoughts at once.

Whether you fall into the generalized or opposite group, this ability to organize and arrange thoughts might explain why some people are finding their home environments more stressful than work. At work, it is expected that you focus only on work responsibilities. You are allowed to put all other responsibilities as a life partner, parent, child, sibling and member of society on the back burner. There are less simultaneous demands at work: no hungry children, shopping lists, dirty dishes, ironing, entertaining friends and family, tending to loved ones, maintenance around the house or spending undivided quality time with your partner.

HOWEVER, the things that make life worth living are indeed all the multiple responsibilities and roles that we just cannot live without (and love having in our lives).

So how do we achieve and maintain a healthy work-life balance?

By attempting to minimize stressors when transitioning from our work- to our home lives.

Creating this much-needed balance between different areas of our lives may very well start by aiming to achieve balance inside our bodies and more specifically, inside our nervous systems.

One of the easiest ways to bring this about is by being aware of your individual needs and addressing those from a sensory perspective:

  • “Sensory leaves”, with high thresholds for sensory input, seek out stimulation to meet their optimal level of arousal.
  • “Sensory roots”, with low thresholds for sensory input, usually avoid too much stimulation from their environments.

Keep in mind though, that sensory strategies are not a “one size fits all” solution.  You need to know and understand your individual sensory assessment before you can fulfill your own needs. This can be done by completing your free Sensory Quiz™ or your full Sensory Matrix™.

Some general ideas to help you cope with the transition between work- and home life may include:

Sensory leaves seeking sensory input       

↑ Listen to music in your car on the way home

↑ Stop by your grocery shop on a daily basis to buy
the evening’s supper ingredients

↑ Spend the first 15 minutes after work at
home catching up with your family

↑ Go out for supper to new restaurant

↑ Have unplanned games nights with your family

↓ Don’t plan your work outfit the day before

Sensory roots avoiding sensory input

↓ Switch the radio off on your way home

↓ Have your suppers pre-planned and go shopping
once a week

↓ Explain to your family that you need quiet, alone-time for the first 15 minutes after getting home from work

↓ Go out for supper at a familiar, quiet restaurant

↓ Plan games nights with your family

↑ Plan the next day’s work outfit before going to bed

I suppose the question (with no right or wrong answer) that each person needs to answer for themselves, will always remain:

Do you work to live or live to work?

 

 

 

 

Over & Out

   Year end functions                 Budgeting                           Christmas shopping                           EXAMS   

Work deadlines                       Holiday planning                           Christmas lunch                   Parenthood

   Family visiting for the holidays                  School concerts                   Socials                                 WhatsApp’s

Relationships                   Elderly parents                    To-Do-Lists                            Household duties

 

Some people call it “burnout”, others refer to it as “having had enough”. For me personally, the best description is “end-of-the-year syndrome”.  Regardless of your word choice, it all boils down to the same state of mind:

  • Being easily overwhelmed
  • Feeling disconnected
  • Having a low tolerance for social interaction
  • Overreacting to little things
  • Seeking social isolation and alone-time
  • Experiencing an inability to cope with everyday stressors

We’ve all been there.

That stage in your day, your week, your year or your life when all you want to do is shout out to the world:

“Over & Out!!!”

The urge to press life’s pause button
From a sensory processing perspective, someone with a low sensory threshold will often experience this need to withdraw and hide from everyday life. At Sensory Intelligence® Consulting we refer to individuals with low sensory thresholds as the roots of the Sensory Tree™. They are the people whose nervous systems struggle to filter, organize and respond appropriately to the various sensory input bombarding their sensory systems from one minute to the next. Their brains receive too much sensory input and simply cannot continue processing all the information in a conventional, organized manner. It is usually at this stage where their nervous system feels like shutting down, resulting in sensory overload… and if not addressed… sensory meltdown. Too many bright lights, crowds, noise, strong smells & tastes and irregular movement will undoubtedly steer them in the direction of isolation as a result of an overactive fight-flight-freeze response.

Having said that, it’s not only our roots who experience the need to isolate themselves, avoiding interaction. People with high thresholds, the leaves of the Sensory Tree™, who tend to crave sensory input and thrive on extra stimulation from their environment, also get bombarded with boundless social demands. Nowadays it is much harder to take a break from social interaction when you need to: if a person cannot reach you by phone, there’s e-mail. And if you’re not replying to e-mails, there’s WhatsApp. And, heaven forbid if you don’t respond to a WhatsApp, where the sender can see that it’s been read due to those horrific 2 blue ticks…

Unfortunately, responding with “Over and Out” when you desperately need that break to avoid a fight-flight-freeze response, would just not be acceptable in our fast-paced world.

Truth be told, we all need to opt out from human contact at times and call for an “Over & Out” break.  Where we are allowed to just “be” and giving our nervous systems time to recuperate… Without having to explain ourselves … without worrying about hurting people’s feelings … without feeling guilty about looking after our own well-being …

Maybe, if we manage to be somewhat kinder to ourselves and allowing our bodies time to relax, we’ll be able to achieve this much needed balance.  The best ways I can think of is by revisiting our reactions when children are on the brink of a sensory meltdown and applying the same rules and suggestions:

  • Go play outside
    And while you’re out there, appreciate the beauty of nature by observing plants, flowers, animals, butterflies, etc.  Smell the roses… and jasmine… and lavender.  Swing in a hammock. Walk barefoot, allowing the grass to tickle your feet.
  • Time out
    Allow yourself time in a calm space with no human or electronic interference.
  • Keep quiet
    Listen… to the sound of the ocean, your favourite music, or do absolutely nothing.
  • Go to bed
    Allow your body and nervous system enough time to rest during the night. If you’re lucky enough, take that afternoon nap!
  • Have a cup of tea
    Soothe your body from the inside out.
  • Get some exercise or go for a massage
    Movement is a number one self-regulating strategy. Also, the effects of deep pressure have been researched for many years – it is a wonderful tool to help calm your nervous system in stressful times.
  • Put your phone or tablet down
    Take a proper social interaction break. This will free up your senses to experience the magnificent world around you.

Sometimes you have to take a break and breathe before you can keep moving forward – Kayla Panchisin

Over & Out!!!

                                                        Roger that?

 

To find out what your sensory thresholds are, do our quick Sensory Quiz™. For a personalised, 26-page guide on how your senses affect the way you live, learn, work and play, visit our Sensory Matrix™ webpage.

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